McCain To Taser Illegals
(The Disassociated Press) In a stunning new web ad expected to only be released if Senator John McCain falls behind in the polls to his Republican primary opponent, the beleaguered former Presidential candidate is expected to taser a family of illegal immigrants.
This kind of ad is expected to be very popular among the anti-immigrant base of the Republican Party which recently forced McCain to tack right on his former common sense approach to immigration.
The web ad’s title is called “McCain gets Tough on Illegals” which has prompted pro-amnesty groups to balk at McCain calling undocumented workers “illegals.” They also balked at McCain tasing the family of “undocumented workers” but said they’d all recover enough to vote in the upcoming election (though not for McCain.)
Reportedly McCain berates the undocumented workers while he’s tasing them screaming things like “Compliments of the Tea Party, mi Amigos!!!!” and “See, I’m to the right of Hayworth!!!”
The anti-government right seems to disbelieve McCain’s late in the game conversion, calling it part of McCain’s tradition of becoming a right wing extremist for six months every six years. While anti-immigrant extremist publicly feigned shock and horror at McCain’s new tactic most mainstream political experts expect the ad to give him a bump in the polls among right wing extremists who secretly like to injure illegals.
One Tea Party activist was reportedly overheard by someone who overheard someone saying that he fully expects McCain to be marching arm-in-arm with Al Sharpton wearing a sombrero six minutes after his reelection.
No word yet on whether the Republican base will consider this new web ad cruel enough to immigrants to gain their support. Journalists are forced to assume from that Tea Partiers will eventually insist on concentration camps for undocumented workers.
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See previous shameless pandering from Sen. John McCain.