Laziest Chickens in the World

I think I have the laziest chickens in the world. They were 22 weeks old yesterday and still no eggs.

Let me be clear, there will be no negotiation. They start giving me eggs or I will make things as painful as possible.

What kind of message do you think a deep fryer will send?

There is no freeloading here. I have been paying for food, water, and lodging for 5 months and have nothing to show for it.

Get with the program or get with the pogrom!
*subhead*Put Your Blurb Here.*subhead*


  1. Maybe your ROOSTER is to blame for their lack of enthusiasm in producing eggs.

  2. Don't have any roosters, my local know-it-all gummint does not allow roosters. And roosters have nothing to do with egg production, for hens or womens.

  3. Fried Chicken Recipe

    1 lb. Flour
    1/2 tin of Hershey's cocoa powder
    Crisco sticks (3)
    cut up chicken
    brown paper bags (3)
    cast iron skillet
    cut up chicken

    1) Double bag two of the bags. Put third on cookie sheet where you will place cooked chicken to drain the grease.

    2) Put the whole bag of flour and half the tin of cocoa and enough salt and pepper to smell it when you shake it.

    3) Put chicken in bag. Shake to coat well.

    4) Melt Crisco sticks (2 to start) in skillet. When they're melted, the oil is hot enough, you can google the exact temp if you have an oil thermometer. Skillet should have about 1-2 inch of oil. It must be hot but not smoking or it will burn. It must be hot to prevent the chicken staying in too long and becoming greasy. This is not deep fry but pan fry.

    5) Put chicken in skillet --do not overcrowd or it will undercook. Cook for 8 minutes, shaking occasionally. Flip. Cook for another 8, flip, and then another 8, again shaking every so often.

    6) Drain on paper bags. Salt and pepper.

    7) If you have more chicken to cook, use a slotted spoon to scoop out the flour bits from the bottom, to prevent bitterness, add the third stick of oil. Lower the heat and wait until it melts, you want to start the next batch with the same or as close to the same conditions as before.

    8) Call people to come taste after both batches are done or you won't get any.


  4. We have had our freeloaders for 6 mo. and only one is laying. We would have died of starvation back in the good ol'days.

  5. Are you sure they aren't laying in the bushes or the woods?

  6. makes the skin this mahogany color, gives it a slight smoky flavor.

  7. Aaaaaaaack! Don't prepare to cook your birds. I got my latest batch of layin' ladies in early March and they didn't start laying until mid-August. So many factors can influence when a pullet begins laying. My first guess for what might be slowing them down is the decline in hours of daylight this time of year. How many hours of light per day are your girls receiving? 12 - 14 hours is desirable, so if you do not have a light inside their coop, wire one up and put it on a timer so they'll have enough hours of light. And then, be patient. . . they will start laying and you will have plenty of fresh eggs. Besides, at this age, they'll already have tougher muscles, so they won't make good eating, except for hawks, raccoons, foxes, and opossums. :-)

  8. I have a light in my coop and a pilot light on my stove.

    We raise ducks and geese and they require MORE FOOD preparing for winter.
    If you want eggs, DOUBLE their food for the fall/winter season.

  10. If you have Barred Plymouth Rock chickens (the ones that look like your picture- no, I don't know it automatically, I looked it up) then you're about at the "average" starting time, although one guy said that his started at week 26.

    Oh, and I lol'd.

  11. Pogrom? Oh my. A "loaded" word at the very least. A pogrom is a violent massacre or persecution of an ethnic or religious group, particularly one aimed at Jews.

    While I appreciate an imaginative sense of humor, when I saw the word pogrom, my smile vanished. I imagine you'll tell me to light up, or something similar. On the use of this word, in this or practically any context, I have to express my concern and objection.

    As Catholics, and as Christians, given the history of persecution and murder of the Jewish people, we must be more sensitive to the use of this word.

  12. Depending on where you live, you may not even be able to kill your chickens for food. We considered it in our city, and the proposed by law did not allow killing even for meat.

  13. My chickens just got killed this week by a resourceful racoon. My chicken wire was pinned down every 16" by a foot long tent stake and covered all around with concrete blocks from old fence posts. The racoon somehow moved the heavy concrete, then extracted the long tent stake, and finally dug a hole under the wire. The ladies did not have a chance.

  14. Just a little advice that might encourage yours to lay. Mine would lay throughout the winter and year round. I had a barred rock and rhode island red. Put a stone egg in the nesting boxes. This prevents them from damaging their own eggs by pecking, and it also signals to them where to lay them, and perhaps is a little encouragement as they think their siblings started laying. Also, keep them fat and happy so they are comfortable trying to lay.

  15. @Tom: Given that "pogrom" is a Russian word, and describes an activity unique to the Russian Empire, only Russian Orthodox people need to be hypersensitive like you are.


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